“Jess Callahan is not ok.
Two months ago, Jess got a phone call that changed her life forever. Her dad had been in a car accident and her mom was now alone, trying to manage the goat farm Jess grew up on by herself. Going back to New Mexico was never a part of Jess' plan, but here she is - stuck in New Mexico and stuck in her faith.
Where was God when the accident happened? If He's truly all powerful and truly loves them, why did God allow her dad to die? How can a loving God be so cruel?
Wrestling both with her thoughts and the goats, Jess is faced with a Will the accident wreck her faith as well? And when her childhood friend shows up, will she set aside her stubbornness and accept the help?
Jess' story of loss is a delicate weaving of grief, redemption and hope.”
Series: A stand-alone novel.
Spiritual Content- Psalm 46:10 at the ending; Many Scriptures are read, quoted, mentioned, thought over, & discussed in a sermon; Prayers, Praising God, & Blessings over food; Church going, worship, & a sermon; Many talks about God, why bad things happen, Heaven, grief, & having Hope; 'H's are capital when referring to God; Jess isn’t on great terms with God after the death of her father & doesn’t believe God care about how hard it is on her family or that God made a huge mistake, later adding that if feels as if God is against her; Jess recalls prior to the accident when she would read her Bible and everything was amicable with her and God & wonders how much of it was her just following the rules and doing what she knew she was supposed to do; *Spoiler* Toward the end with love, prayers, and discussions with her mom and Trey lead Jess to read different Scriptures and while she may not understand why her father died, she will trust God *End of Spoiler*; Many mentions of God & Jesus; Many mentions of churches, church going, pastors, sermons, services, hymns/songs, youth group; Mentions of prayers, praying, & blessings over food; Mentions of Bibles, Bible reading, & Scriptures; Mentions of those & events in the Bible; Mentions of Heaven; A couple mentions of Christians; A couple mentions of Christian radio stations; A mention of a miracle.
Negative Content- Minor cussing including: a form of ‘crap’, a ‘gosh’, a ‘holy cow’, an ‘idiot’, a ‘for Pete’s sake’, a ‘ticked’, a ‘sheesh’, a ‘stupid’, two forms of ‘dumb’, & three ‘dang it’s; When Trey comments on “what they say about assuming”, Jess baits him to see if he’ll say the word in front of her and her mother, but he deflects with the mention of a teacher they both had that would throw out the “occasional curse word”; Sarcasm & Eye rolling; Pain, Injuries, & Blood/Bleeding (barely-above-not-detailed); Grief & some guilt/what-ifs (up to semi-detailed); Many mentions of Jess and her family’s grief, the sudden death of her father, & lightly the details of how it happened (car accident, up to semi-detailed on everything else); Mentions of other deaths (from cancer & a brain tumor); Mentions of divorces & a father leaving his family; Mentions of lies, lying, & liars; Mentions of predators attacking and killing goats and chickens (barely-above-not-detailed); A couple mentions of child abusers; A mention of murderers; A mention of a hostile government attacking another one; A mention of a bombing; A mention of puke; A mention of a rabid raccoon killing a rabbit;
*Note: Mentions of goats going through labor with some blood/details & having constipation (barely-above-not-detailed); Mentions of TV shows, movies, & fictional characters (Seinfeld, American Idol, Phineas and Ferb, Gilmore Girls, Day After Tomorrow, The Princess Bride, & Miracle on 34th Street); Mentions of Starbucks; Mentions of brand names (Pepsi, Coke, Carhartt, Band-Aid, LL Bean, & Motrin); Mentions of car brands; Mentions of social media platforms; A few mentions of anxiety (including Jess panicking that her mom could be killed or paralyzed); A few mentions of restaurants & places (Sonic, Cracker Barrel, Ace Hardware); A few mentions of Hallmark movies; A couple mentions of sleeping pills given to help with anxiety; A mention of a Disney movie; A mention of a zombie apocalypse.
Sexual Content- A head kiss, a cheek kiss, four not-detailed kisses, two barely-above-not-detailed kisses, and a semi-detailed kiss; Touches, Embraces, Hand holding, Warmth, Nearness, (borderline barely-above-not-detailed // semi-detailed); Blushes & Winks; Noticing (barely-above-not-detailed); Mentions of girlfriends/boyfriends, dating, & dates; Mentions of crushes & broken hearts; Mentions of girls fawning over Trey when they were growing up; Mentions of prom; A few mentions of kisses & kissing; A couple mentions of flirting; Some love, falling in love, & the emotions.
-Jessica “Jess” Callahan, age 27
1st person P.O.V. of Jess
220 pages
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Pre Teens-
New Teens-
Early High School Teens-
Older High School Teens-
My personal Rating-
{Add up to a full star for those who have recently lost loved ones.}
I knew this book would make me cry.
It did. Many times in fact, eight times to be exact. Plus another seven times of the words going blurry on my screen. (Honestly, I was already tearing up at the end of the first chapter.)
I hate to say that this book was relatable because that feels weird to say about a book with such a focus on grief. Maybe a better way to say it would be that I felt seen. My grief of losing a sibling is obviously much different than Jess’ or the author’s grief of losing a parent, but I felt so many of the same emotions she felt and questions that she had. Saying that grief is hard is an understatement, but this book handled it so well with discussing the Hope we have to have while we grieve, to focus on Jesus during those times. I truly wish I had this book a year ago, but it was still a balm to my healing heart, as cheesy as that might sound.
On another note: I love how male leads in Erynn Mangum’s books encourage the main girl in her faith. I’ve easily read 2000+ Christian Fiction books over the years and rarely do I ever see a male lead do this like I see in a book by this author. This is part of the inspiring faith content I sign up for when I read an Erynn Mangum book. I love it. Add in that Trey in this story is Jess’ brother’s best friend and I was tickled pink at the sweet romance. It wasn’t the main focus of the book as that’s definitely more about Jess’ grief and what’s next for her, but it was there and weaved through the book in such a natural way.
This book may have made me cry, but it was also so healing to my scarred heart. An excellent book to say the least.
See y’all on Friday with a new review!
*BFCG may (Read the review to see) recommend this book by this author. It does not mean I recommend all the books by this author.
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